Archive for the ‘Advice for new Dommes and subs’ Category

There are a lot of submissives / slaves out there who have tried to live a normal vanilla life and find that something is missing in their existence. They try their best (or better try their best) to not break their wedding vows, but simply find that there is a space deep inside their psyche that needs to be filled, and sadly they either discovered their need for submission too late, or thought that it was something they could ignore. In those cases, this submissively inclined male may look outside of his marriage for a powerful and knowledgeable Domme to train and use him.

In many cases they may request the time and “services” of a Pro-Domme and have the mistaken idea that since they pay for the time of the Lady in question, they now can call the shots. For kinky Escorts that may work very well and she can simply concentrate on filling this gent’s fantasy and make her money at the same time, but for an actual Domme this would not work out well. In my case, it would not be possible for you to gain an appointment with me if you have the mistaken idea of serving me only on your terms. I am a lifestyler who has chosen to make part of her living via her passion and craft. I am not unfeeling and will tailor your sessions with me to your area of interests, which will not make a big difference to me, since I only take sessions, which fall under my interests to begin with. What I will not allow you to do however, is make demands and/or allow you to top from the bottom. There is a big difference between bringing something I need to know to my attention, using a safety out when necessary and being a pain in the ass wanna be sub who thinks he runs the show.

Less often a married sub may try to find a Domme whom he will see on a regular base, and has a service oriented D/s relationship interest in. Here you need to set very strict guidelines to ensure the sanctity of his marriage vows is not preached. For example, sexual service is never to be part of this, in my opinion, since his vanilla sex life is taken care of rightly by his Wife. I find it disturbing when a married submissive or a married Domme (whom are not married to each other) participate in sexual intercourse with each other. Unless everyone, meaning the sub and his wife, the Domme and her husband, have sat down together and have openly and honestly discussed this and an agreement was made by all. Obviously, that happens extremely seldom!

How can you take a married submissive on then without causing extreme difficulties in his marriage? Well, first of you need to see the mindset of the particular submissive in question. Learn the difference between a lousy cheating husband who is only looking for a bit of diversion because his ass is bored in his marriage and he isn’t really even remotely submissive, and a submissive male who somehow trapped himself in a marriage that can not fill his submissive nature.

So how can you tell the difference and which submissive should you as an honorable Domina give the opportunity of service to?

How does he talk about his wife to you?
A submissive male, especially one that is interested in serving a powerful Goddess, would never bad mouth his wife to you. In many ways, she is his Goddess already but sadly doesn’t have the attributes, interests or personality it would take for him to become her slave. He doesn’t want to hurt or harm her, and often times it causes him a certain amount of guilt feelings that he is stepping outside of his marriage bond to come to you. A submissive male will speak honestly and openly to you about his wife and his children if there are any and matter of fact often times with a large amount of respect and pride. A married submissive often prefers for the Goddess to be married as well, so that there is never any chance she will get attached beyond their agreement. He is not looking to replace his wife, only to fill a void. Be aware that a lot of guys have learned from reading how to fake those sentiments, so you need to really ask questions and see how they react to your questions and if they have staying power in their story. Remember that Liars will lose track eventually of the lies they tell.

A submissive will want to have a ground rule of setting his family first and will not serve a Goddess who thinks that she comes before his family. Remember that if he in time furthers himself to become your slave, you will be of equal importance in his life, but never more important then his family whom he swore fealty to. If that bothers you as a Goddess, you should never even consider taking on a married submissive.

Understand that with a married submissive your scene / play time and service as a financial submissive is limited as well. Never place him in the situation to where he can not provide for his family first. That usually goes just as much for a single sub, but even more so for a married one, since he is responsible for more than just his own person.
Since this is largely about financial domination, I will put it even more geared towards this particular fetish. Make certain that he understands that by serving you, he is now taking on the responsibility to be loyal to both “Goddess’s” in his life.

A married submissive comes with a lot of “handicaps” but also a lot of benefits. Don’t see the wife as your enemy, but rather as your “friend”. Remember, that she really is in many ways the innocent victim in this drama, and so you need to make certain she remains happy as well.

A married submissive is not for every Domina. If you are “ALL ABOUT ME!” type, please skip on them. You are holding not only one life but often multiple ones in your hand and have to have the integrity and honor it takes to make it work.

The married sub, who already no longer cares about his marriage, and is in many ways on the way out of the relationship. You can tell how he will talk about his wife as well. He still shows respect in his speech and has many good things to say about her, but he just can’t do it any more. His need to submit is taking over. At that point you need to make a choice if you want to get involved into this or not. You will have drama! Lots and lots of Drama and you can potentially get into a deep issue with the guys wife, on the other hand you can save the marriage as well if you know how to once again “spice up” their marriage, without her even realizing it. Remember that as a Domina, you are also a psychologist in many ways. You need to know and understand the inner working of your submissives. Learn to use that knowledge for your own agenda, but also to advance his life.

What not to allow! NEVER let him use his marriage as an excuse why he can’t tribute, why he can’t serve etc. He needs to understand from the beginning that you will not play his games. Rather agree upon a smaller and regular tribute, a longer period of time in between contacts etc. Be creative in your assignments so his wife can be included and maybe even feel a bit more loving towards him.

Which sub can you give a chance? A mature and honorable submissive. Try your best to stay away from the younger punks. They really are not into this. If however you have a submissive that has been married for 20 + years already to the same lady, you can give it a go. Don’t take a newly wed sub on! EVER! You will destroy that marriage in a heartbeat. Make sure that the submissive is not borderline broke all the time. With other words if he already struggles to pay his families bills, has to force his wife to work two jobs just to make ends meet, don’t walk away. RUN AWAY!

Remember this is financial domination included here, so make certain he has his own play money and is not forced to take it out of the household. As far as I am concerned, I will take financial submissives play money without any mercy, if he is really into pushing it I may allow him once in a great while to push his finances a little as long as he can cover them safely.

There are many more things to keep in mind, but this is a good beginning rule!

As always this writing is copyright and if you wish to post it on your blog etc, please make certain to give me credit for it and a link back to me. Thank you!

Before I get started on this Article let me put it in perspective for some of you more “foolish” souls, because that I feel it necessary to even clarify these coming words is disturbing to me in its own way. I do not condone in any way, shape or form involvements with a Minor in a sexual manner. Matter of fact personally I think adults sexually going after kids is sick, add incest into it and to me you need a hole – 6 ft under if I make myself clear.

I would hope that as a financial Domme you would not consider engaging in a sexual act for money with your submissives, because in that case you have crossed over into prostitution, which is an entirely different horse of a different color.
Again, take a good, hard look at the way I worded it. ENGAGING in a sexual act for money with your submissive, not if you are in an actual real time (couple) relationship with your submissive and financial domination is part of it.
I do not consider comparing your “parenting style” with your style as a Domme (remember this is fetish based) as crossing the line, because in neither occasion you should be sexually involved. Boy do I hope I made this clear, because the first ignorant comment I get, will be blasted.

In many ways, I as a Domme have to “raise” my new submissive to act and behave in a way that I find pleasing, acceptable and worthy of my name. I need to drill certain rituals and routines into them until they become second nature.
In many ways the behavior of a collared sub or even a sub under consideration, reflects back on the Domme. Be it fair or not, it is a fact.
Now let’s look at the way the world sees you and your offspring. Do they not also see the behavior of your youngsters and automatically judge you as the parent? Even up to these now so “enlightened” days that is still happening. Did you not also have to spend endless hours of having to teach them certain things?
Perhaps now you can start seeing the connection.

I have learned over time that when I deal with a submissive I often act, react, train, discipline, punish etc along the same principalities that I used in raising my kids. I would allow certain “mistakes” to happen for a certain amount of time, before I would invoke disciplinary actions, where as in other cases even one misstep would bring about instant disciplinary actions without mercy. I realized that I looked at their “confusion” to some of my Orders as often times an excuse to try to get out of things and so started acting the same way with them as I would with my offspring when I set down my Orders or Rules. By the end of this behavior, neither had an excuse in “I didn’t understand that” or “ I was confused”. By the time the Rule or Order is in affect there are no doubts left or you should have addressed them with me then.
To address this issue I will showcase to you my personal “parenting” style or submissive “training” style. Again none of the subjects, topics or areas are of a sexual nature, but rather everyday, normal, commonsense behaviors that allow us as Fetishists or BDSMer’s to actually live our Lifestyle of choice out in the open without fear of recrimination. I call it my Goddess Manners and acceptable behavior Rules.

#1 You will never wonder why I give an order or about the consequences if you disobey it.
The one thing that I find very annoying when witnessing with others is the tendencies for parents to tell their kids to do something that appears to make no sense. Even more so with an adult submissive you will run into a problem. If it doesn’t make sense to the Person they are less willing to get it done. I understand that in a perfect dream world of BDSM, you as the “superior” would only have to give the order and the person mindlessly will do it. That is actually not just stupid, but also in some cases dangerous.
Some orders should never have to be explained, but sadly in some cases what seems 100% obvious to you, may not seem that way to another person.
I made it a Rule when dealing with my kids that I always gave an order clearly, gave them reason why I made the Rule and also what would happen to them if they broke my Rule.
Since we are dealing with financial domination I will talk about a money rule. Being on time! When my Kids got old enough to earn their own money (allowances for chores, extra work they would do for me to make things easier for me, or little odd and end jobs they would do for friends and neighbors) they were fined when they were not on time coming home, for dinner, for an appointment etc.

A conversation would look something like this:
I, or anyone else, should never be made to wait if you can help it. You should always be on time or preferably a few minutes early. If you can’t be on time it is only polite to call and inform the person that you will be running behind and give them a choice to wait or reschedule with you. Remember that not only your life is important, but theirs too.
That was the Order. BE on Time for any appointment you have agreed to.

The usual objections: Something could have come up! Maybe I was delayed somewhere. I forgot to the time, because I was so busy. I didn’t know what time it was. They can wait a moment, if they agreed to meet me they didn’t have anything else to do. But others are always late. (Sounds familiar?)

The reinforcement: If something important came up you can call as soon as you know. You should ALWAYS give yourself plenty of time to get where you have to be, so leave early if you must. They agreed to make time for you, not that they didn’t have anything better to do. They honored you, but putting you first! Yes, and I never wait longer then 5 to 10 min. on anyone, before I walk away.

The Reasons for my Order: Number 1 politeness of course. It is highly annoying to me personally how others take your time for granted these days. Number 2, your being late may hinder that person in filling a promise they have made to someone else, because they have to wait on you and now look and feel bad. Your actions, cause a ripple effect.
And on your selfish level…you would not like to have it done to you!

The consequence: A Fine. I used to charge them 25 cents for every minute they were late, without calling me to let me know that they were going to be ok, why they were late and how late they would be. Starting at 5 minutes after the time I set. I did it then and it only took a few times, before they learned not to do that again. UP to this day (and my kids are all grown up and out of the house), when they have an appointment with me and are running late they call me to let me know what it going on. I of course have always given them the same courtesy.

With my submissives I hold it the same way. An assignment is due on time, a meeting is due on time. When I assign it to you, I always ask you first if you can get it done in time for me and once you say “Yes Ma’am.” the order is set. You have entered a verbal agreement with me, which is binding as far as I am concerned. Don’t get it turned in on time, don’t show up in time and you will be fined by me. Nothing will happen for you again until that fine is paid to me.

#2 Discipline is there not to be mean, but to teach you safe and correct behavior. I do it because I like / love you.
I seldom punish, but I do discipline frequently. As you grow in age and understanding those disciplinary actions will become less frequent, but more extreme as I know you should by now have learned better. Your freedoms and privilege will also increase as you learn to walk within my guidelines.

Every Parent hears this at least a few times in their life. “I hate you”, “You are so unfair”, “XYZ is allowed to do it, you just don’t want me to have fun.”, “if you cared about me, you wouldn’t punish me like that”.

The first time I heard the dreaded “I hate you” it almost ripped my heart apart. I knew it would come, but I was not prepared for it. The equivalent form of that sentence for a sub would be “You are a fucking Bitch!” or “Or I don’t want to serve you anymore”. Not because of legit reasons, but because he/she didn’t get their way.
Now for me, no matter how much it hurt I had to show them who was in charge. I could have simply did as so many others would have done and scream and yell at them, sent them to their rooms, threaten to wash their mouth out etc, or handle it the way I did.

I simply stood there and said “Thank you for letting me know, because now I can treat you differently then those that know I do this because I love them, not because I want to be mean.” It worked each time, my kids would stop in their tracks.

See here is your choice, you can either live by the Rules you agreed to uphold and be very comfortable, happy and content, or you can break them and either accept the discipline and learn from it or leave. “Ouch.”

Do I ever want to see any of them go? Of course not, but by putting it in perspective they understand that I won’t be pushed around. Again I had already explained my rules to them to begin with, so that excuse was null and void. By being consistent with my Discipline they knew that I meant business and were less tempted.

#3 Being disciplined, fined etc doesn’t make the Order Null and void. You are still responsible to get it done!

With my kids it was cleaning their room, doing the dishes or helping with the laundry. They figured if I fined them for not doing their chores when it was their turn, they had paid their way out of it. NO! You now have a double whammy. You lost money and you still have to get it done. Sorry Charlie!
Submissives I found are the same way. They figure that if I give them an Assignment, a deadline and they “forget about it” or “weren’t able to do it” and fined them for it, they are done and don’t have to do it anymore. After all they got fined right? NO, you got fined as a disciplinary action. I took money that you did not give freely to me in order to remind you to get the work part of your servitude to me done, but that doesn’t mean you paid your way out of it. I did agree to be hired to do it for you.
I simply expect it to be done the next time I check.

#4 Privileges have to be earned! Show me I can trust you!
My word is my credit and if you haven’t noticed that I talk a lot, explain a lot, teach a lot and show where I am coming from, than you need to go back to square one now please. I do not make promises that I don’t intent on holding. Yes, I do sometimes have to beg out because I can simply not get it done, but that is never without a very good reason. You will earlier hear me say, I will try to have it done then …it will be done. Once I say, ok I will do this. It is done period!
So as far as I am concerned I have proven myself over and over already again to those around me. Now it is your turn. Special privileges that you would not naturally have from me until I have seen you being dependable are one of those things with me.
With my kids it was a big ticket item they wanted, a pet maybe, longer times out in the evening or perhaps an outing with someone else. My leash “control” used to be very tight, but as they shown me that they could handle the responsibility that came with the privileges then I would let go a bit more. Let them have a bit more each time. With my submissives it is the same way. The longer and more faithfully they serve me, the less I have to discipline, the more they please me with thoughtful behavior which I don’t have to stand on, the deeper their privileges with me will become. I am much more giving and free with people who have proven their responsible and well mannered behavior towards me then those who just hold their hands out and “expect”.

As always my writing is copyright to me. If you would like to post it somewhere else, then please make certain you give me the credit for my words and a link back! Thank you.

In “regular” BDSM Lifestyle the highest goal is to be allowed to go to being fully collared and have the great privilege of signing a “Slave Contract”. To many online submissives that too is still a dream that they hold very dear to their hearts. That is until the coveted day finally arrives and the Contract in question is being offered by the Master/ Mistress/ Dom/ Domme etc.

Now suddenly the reality starts setting in. A contract is binding, is not something you can walk away from without serious repercussions and in many ways is for life. Depending on which Contract we speak of, they can go for a timed period (training or short term position) to a full Ownership / Property which in ideal circumstances will go until one of the participants dies. A very exciting and also very scary thought for many submissives, isn’t it.

Now, again let us put a dose of reality into this. No matter what you may wish to be true, we must understand that this Contract is only binding to ourselves and our honor. It would never stand up in a Court of Law and matter of fact could cause both parties quiet a few problems, should they be stupid enough to try to take legal actions against each other. I do hope that we are all on the same page about that one here.

I have often been asked by several different Mistresses if I knew a website that had good standard slave contracts that she could just print and send to her boy. I am very sorry, but my answer always has to be no to this one. Just like I don’t believe in “registering” my boys in an online “Slave Registry” for many common sense reasons, neither do I believe in using “generalized” and standard slave contracts.

Each slave is an individual with very specific needs, desires, gifts and offerings that he/she brings to their potential “Owner”. Each has undergone a different journey to this point and in some cases has a different destination ahead of him/her. For me to use such a “run of the Mill” contract that someone other then either of us thought up would be not only an injustice to the sanctity of this very honorable position, but also demeaning in my eyes to my-self (I can’t think for myself?) and my slave (he/she can’t think for them-self?).

So how do I work this particular situation? Simple, if it is a times or position based contract that I wish to extend then I will write the Contract and offer it after a consideration period to the particular applicant. Since this is not a lifetime position or even a long term position it will be a very basic contract, clearly stating the position and time frame in question. It will cover the requirements of said position and the “how to fill them”. It will show clearly, what will happen (disciplinary actions) if the position is not filled as has been agreed upon (time frame and amount / work). It will have a safeguard (in case of emergencies coming up for the slave – loss of job (will have to be proven), sudden long term illness (again subject to proof), or unforeseen circumstances (family illness, travel for job, etc) in which case an extension will be granted without penalties). A buy out will also be written in, incase the person is not able to fill the position or has ended up changing his/her mind and wishes to do the honorable thing. In that case, they can use the “buy out” clause to end the contract without causing the Mistress any undue inconveniences. (For financial Domination). Remember not to be honorable, can cause you potential problems in finding a new Mistress later on. We do talk to each other and often comments on the Internet are widely available.

In the case of a long term or lifetime slavery, I require to slave to put a lot of work in. Instead of me writing the Contract, I am forcing him to really consider his actions by making him/ her write the contract and presenting it to me for inspection before we BOTH sign and date it. In some cases I may even ask a third person as Witness to sign with us.

What should the Slave put into this sort of very old school and official type of Slavery Contract?

His/her real name, followed by the slave name I have begifted him/ her with. His full date of birth and location. The date he/she began serving me and what his/her position in my house / temple (virtual, long distance or real time) has been so far and he/she aspires to be.
The reasons he/she feels they should serve me in such a manner and what “crimes” (reasons he/she feels he is “inferior” to me) has committed that warrant a lifetime or long term servitude as slave. (Remember that is the erotic sexual fantasy part here. So if he is a dirty little cum eater who can never get enough cock – that is a reason he can add. If he finds that he is an “inferior male” in front of this particular Goddess in the forenamed position then that too is a reasonable “crime” to add).
The limits he/she begs me to accept and honor and the boundaries he/she may wish to have pushed in due time.
The punishments that he/she understands will happen if he/she willfully breaks the agreement of the contract (usually a punishment is removal of presence for a longer period of time, or dismissal in extreme cases). The disciplinary actions and penalties which may occur if he/she should forget his/her place.

A personal Note (often a worshipful prayer) to the Mistress / Master that speaks from the heart of his/her devotion.

If it is part of a harem/ hisem, you may want to have him/her include their respect to the sisters and brothers in service of the household and the understanding of his/her station in regards to them.

An alpha slave (number 1) will pledge in that case protection over his “little” sisters and brothers in the absence of the Owner. State the agreed upon rights and privileges, but also responsibilities in regards to being the right hand of the Owner. (This will be witnessed by the lesser slaves if possible). Remember that an alpha will be held partially accountable of the failure of good service by those under his/her care. Being an alpha (Temple Priest) is a double edged sword.

A closing Note with the desire that he/she may have his contract accepted.

Space for both signatures, dates and witnesses if necessary. Some of these contracts can be quiet long. In some cases up to 3 to 4 Pages long and will be doubled with one copy staying with the slave and the other for the Owner.

Now the contract will be delivered respectfully to the future Owner, who will read it over carefully. Question if necessary unclear parts and either accept it as is or will order revisions if necessary. Once a contract is signed it is standing.

Personally, I believe that a Contract should be revisited every few years and adjustments made as necessary. Medical conditions, mental conditions, financial conditions, household conditions all can change and must be taken into consideration at that particular time.

Limits change and need to be adjusted as well. Remember that as you grow older, your body and mind will change as well. You will not always be able to do certain things you once used to be able to do.

Remember that no matter which rights you may sign away in your “slave contract”, you still remain a human being and as such will have issues to deal with. Ironically most of the time some of the biggest issues mentally always seem to test you right after you have signed the Contracts and that is when it truly becomes a testing ground as to how honorable and dedicated both Master/Mistress and slave are.

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ALL MY WRITING is copyright to me and is not to be republished in part or in total without my consent. Feel free to link to my Articles, but please make certain to give me the proper credit. Thank you as always for reading!

Goddess Bella Donna

Gone fishing for money!

Hello my little puppets, honored fellow ladies and a few people who I don’t care about one way or the other. LOL, quiet the address isn’t it. The facts are the facts however. I know who and what is lurking half the time on my Blogs and I can always see when my traffic increases to my Blogs.

Most of the time it is an outrageous Blog post that makes your poor cocks stiff and the ladies think if this is something they want to try for themselves. Stop right there buster before you take that wrong. I am not calling anyone a Copycat here, matter of fact that gets on my last nerve most of the time. There is very little in human nature that has not been done before, I don’t think any of us hold patents on what is being done. What is unacceptable however is the theft of “content or words”. With other words, do you own damn talking or thinking! If you want to copy mine then give me a damn link back and the credit.

So today’s topic is: Gone fishing for money!

I am talking about the base down advertisements, marketing skills and bragging posts of financial domination that you will find all over the internet, forums, websites etc. You have different types of financial Dom/mes (yes you keep forgetting that guys are often in this as well. Gays actually are a lot more generous with their Masters then most straight / bi subs are with their Mistresses) as I have mentioned many times before.

For some it is “the fetish they enjoy” and truly don’t care all that much if they do make money or gifts or not. They just like the attention and the begging turns them on. For them it is their “lifestyle”, but they enjoy the journey so much more then the destination.

Your fulltime Financial Dom/mes, who have almost specialized into this and they are both turned on, empowered and yes very business like about this endeavor. Those are the ones you will see advertising more, marketing their particular skills and be in your face about it.

You Sugar Babies posing as Financial Dom/mes. Now there is nothing wrong with being a Sugar Baby if you want to let yourself go down that path, but it is not financial domination in any way. However, they too are heavily advertising themselves and more often then not their marketing skills truly are up to par.

And then you have the cross in betweens of course.

Now, as you can guess I am in the second category with a bit of first category mixed in. I am very much about the destination, but surely enjoy the journey as well. However, it is part of my fulltime profession and hence I do demand to be paid for my time.

In many ways it is as if I am selling a Product I believe in 100%. I have to believe in that product or I could not be affective at selling it. The Product is ME, my time and yes my skill as a manipulative, seductive, powerful and knowledgeable Financial Domme.

If I do not believe in myself, then I am not only going to sink, but will also let others walk straight over me. Ever since “financial domination” has become popular and almost mainstream, it has changed a lot from what it used to be. Now it is really more about the instant gratification of the submissive then the adoration and worship of the Mistress. It has largely become a “TRADE” to be completed. Don’t even bother putting your nose up in the air about that one. This is fetish straight talk, remember?

No Mistress is going to waste her time anymore with “subs” for long until they have proven to be worthy of her attention. You see with so much written text on the internet, any idiot now can read and repeat what they find. Nobody can tell on the internet if that person is real, truly feeling what they say or not. You are hidden behind a big smoke screen and largely it becomes an illusionary feat. So, is it prudent to not get too invested into a new seeker? I would say so.

But what about the submissives? How can they find out if the Lady is real or not. DO YOUR HOMEWORK! I have said that so often before. Research the lady a little. A Website alone doesn’t make you a financial Domme. A famous name or being on tons of financial domination fetish sites doesn’t either. You can brag about your accomplishments until the cows come home and it still can be made up or copied.

However, have a chat with the person sometime in one of the Chat rooms sometime and really listen to how she answers questions. Can she answer question. See where all you can find her on the internet. Does she have other interests? How is she represented?

This will tell you a lot about this person. I am all over the internet under Goddess Bella Donna, Regina Sunderland (my real name and the one I write under), Mysteria on Niteflirt and several others. I interlink just about everything I do, so you can get the big picture of who you are dealing with.

If you want to chat with me in private on my Yahoo Messenger you can, but be prepared to at least show your appreciation of my work and time.

Reality is that NOTHING is ever for FREE. Not for me and not for you either. You want to be turned on and I want your money. You love me and I love your money. You amuse me (if you are lucky) or even your money won’t be enough to keep me sticking around.

I put a lot of time and effort into what I do. Again I am my own Product which I foster, develop, care for and yes market 150% of the Time. I will make a sell so to speak and you are my prospective “Costumer”, only you don’t get to call the shots. I DO.

Is there a money back guarantee? NO, although I had plenty of boys be shit heads and give gifts just to cancel them after they got off. That is also part of what you have to accept and deal with. Like I said…. Gone fishing for money.

Every time you see one of the Blog Posts coming up, it is fishing for money. Fishing for someone that a. has the funds to tribute, b. gets off tributing so he/she will return often, c. will amuse you so you are willing to deal with them repeatedly, d. advance you further both in mind and finances.

DON’T STOP THERE. Learning from what you have done wrong is also part of fishing for money. What is the ultimate Goal of a financial Domme? Come on think!

To find high quality piggies, cash cows, money slaves who are both willing and able to tribute her in an agreed upon fashion, who will be both amusing and loyal as much as possible. To find a “large” quantity of “tribute as they go” piggies (fly by boys or occasional financial fetishists who really are only into it for the quick satisfaction).
To have a decent to luxuries lifestyle that allows them to effectively find above named submissive and in the end have them help in providing the desired lifestyle, which in turn should give the submissive sublime pleasure and a feeling of success.

Here is the catch 22 however. By showing your intelligence and making yourself available to said submissives in more then the typical “Gimme write ups” you scare most of them to death. Greed they can deal with, half naked bodies they adore, a wicked mind is fantastic as long as it stays fetish oriented, but give them something they can actually “fall in love with” and it becomes scary.

Males by their very nature are “commitment challenged” and so you have to find the fine line between giving too much of your-self and not enough.

Finding your submissive piggies is really like fishing for fish. You need to find the right bait to lure them in, understanding the climate of the pond you are fishing in and if you see that it is too crowded with Fishermen cut bait and move on.
Remember that even the smallest fish is good for something, even if it just to “cut him up” and use him for bait for bigger fish. No I don’t want you to actually cut people up here, but I mean you have someone that adores you so much they can’t stop talking about you. Or you can tell them all about how he begged to serve you etc.
Readers eat that up, that is why so many posts are “glory posts”.

Use your mind wisely and don’t ever put all your eggs into one basket Ladies. Submissive males are much like children. They love to sample sweets, but are often unable to buy. Keep yourself innovative and new, but true to your personality.
Don’t be afraid to speak your mind, but be aware that there are 100’s of “Ladies” out there that are just waiting to cut you to shreds. So be able to back up what you are saying. There is nothing worst then a vicious tongue, understand what you are up against.

And realize that even so males are “disgusted” by that show of unladylike behavior it is just like female wrestling, they tune in to see the “”fly.

That is it for today. As always if you are going to use what I write, please give the copyright to me and a link back. I appreciate it.

I am working on a Book about financial domination with no nonsense writing as you see here. If you are interested in more articles by me, which I may or may not publish on here, please sign up for my FREE to you Newsletter. You will receive this Newsletter biweekly. Plus special offers for you boys which are exclusive to my Readership. Updates on the release of my Book etc.

Ok, drum roll please! This is going to be partially one of these utter duh articles that most sadly still overlook! So in order to be my lovely self _ Captain Obvious_ , I have decided to type them down for those of you, who seldom think past the dick or the money!

#1 You forget the word Relationship in the equation!
There is a super big difference between a casual draining, a fly by tributing and actually building a financial domination Relationship that could / would go to full Ownership. Most seem to overlook the meaning of the Word Relationship in the equation here. Which simply means, you are not only getting together to drain, to stroke or to “get off”. You actually have to be willing to get to know the opposite partner in a “non-sexual”, “non-fetish” manner. Which means you have normal conversations and are “loyal” unless otherwise discussed. Mix in the fact that you won’t have “sex” unless you are actually real time, in a couple situation and that is part of your agreement (24/7, husband / wife – Mistress/Master / slave/ pet/ sub) and you have an entirely different dynamic all together. However, since males by their nature have a problem being comitted and staying comitted (biology / psychology – don’t make me pull proof and schoolbook texts) it is never easy to build and stay in a relationship that is “not hands on”. So you need to be doubly willing to work through the good, the bad and yes the ugly.

#2 The Brain is in the skippies!
I grinch, and I mean I grinch, everytime I read about stiffies in either genders underwear. It is a natural fact of life that you will get aroused and since this is an adult fetish definately has its place, but when it in the end comes down to just the “stiffness factor” then you have already lost the Game. Why? Because if someone can not think past their arousal, they will not be in it for the long run. They are always looking for greener grass on the other side. Now since most males seem to get off on having a lot of “brothers in service” that may not be a problem, until you can no longer “provide” that arousal for your Miss.

#3 Different Brain Waves!
If you have a Domina and a sub who are on two different Brain Waves, you might as well click the heels and go back to Kansas. In order for a longstanding Relationship to work, you do need at least the equal Brain Power in each. If you have a sub who is super smart coupled with a Domina that thinks being cute is all it takes, but her brains are a bit on the lower region you are asking for disaster. Eventually the Boobies and the Ass will stop dominating (usually right after the first orgasm) until the next “oh baby, baby I will do anything for you” comes along again. Remember that domination comes with the mind, not just with the body. Yes, you do have to have an attraction to each other. Personally, if I have to put a plastic bag over your body so I can stand being in the same room with you there is a problem. But come on, it isn’t all about the looks.

Turn that around. A Domina that is highly intelligent and has a sub for service that still has an issue putting two and two together, then there is an issue to. She will constantly be bored, aggravated and disappointed by him. He just doesn’t have what it takes. Likewise he will be hurt and frustrated, because he won’t know what the hell she wants half the time.

#4 Making it too complicated!
I know a few Ladies who pride them-selves on their over the top high standards. Those are wonderful for certain, but when you get into a Relationship you better learn to do some compromises. Again not fly by or casual drainings here, but relationships. Why? Because NOBODY is PERFECTION. Get over it already, that is a turn on catch phrase. If you are so darn perfect you wouldn’t be here, because the world would already know you as perfect and you would be too busy solving real problems besides what color you want to paint your toenails today, for which you need to take a poll. Ok, that was harsh, but sorry lets keep it simple.
Make your Rules with the old Wisdom in mind. You can’t win every battle, nor can you fight each battle. Make the decision which is the most important to you and stick to them. Make the Rules clear and remember that every humann being is different from each other, so keep that in mind.

#5 Can shaking mislabelments!
Yes, I am going there! There is a difference between constant can shaking and making your wishes known in a precise way. If you can’t speak up about what you want, (males seldom are good at taking hints by the way – sissy gurls are too wrapped up in their own panties to even notice the hint) then you will never receive it. But there is a difference between your entire life is one big … I want, I deserve, I have to have, gimme, gimme now … and a mention in between other information. Now EACH ONE OF US LADIES, will blog, talk, or tell you what we want. The difference comes in how it is done. Blessing to those of you Ladies who I just did misjustice too and you NEVER have asked for anything. I beg pardon! Don’t go highwire on me. But in general, if you are in a Relationship and all you do is ask for stuff and never give anything valuable in return, then keep those luggages backed for your next glamarous vacation, because your wallet boy is going to get tired of you sooner or later.

#6 Poor little hurt me….leave the baggage at the door!
I am one of the first to admit that I flat out say, that I am disgusted with most of the players on both ends. The reality is that out of 100 Dominas and subs you MAY find 10 who are at least trying to be real about it all, and out of those 10 you have 1 or 2 who are and are always trying to get better at what they do with the shifting times. Guess what, WE are HUMAN, WE are going to get HURT. So here is the deal. I will honestly tell you in the beginning that I don’t expect you to come through for me, now it is up to you to shock the shit out of me and proof me wrong. I am going to do my part to show you what type of DOMINA I am. That doesn’t mean I am the same sort as Lady Lovelylocks, Miss AllZAT, Mistress Kissmyass or Princess Loserfucker… I am me! I have my very own ways, my very own style and I love being who I am. Like I said before. I am not perfect, but Iam perfectly me. That is all you are getting, you don’t get more then that. So yes, sure tell me your woes once and then get over it already. If it becomes an excuse for breathing, please get out of the fetish for a while and relax for a bit. Heal first! You need to heal for your own good. Rebounds seldom work out.

#7 What the blazes do you want?
Guess what folks, we both need to know what we want. If you don’t know what you want from the opposite, then how can they give it to you?
I have gents come on here and complain that “We demand too much and that it is not good to constantly have demands made”, then you have the opposite two minutes later. “I want to be told to give…Make me! But don’t be pushy!” Fuck me a river boys. What the heck would you like? How about I create you a little computer you can load the photo of your favorite Porn Actress into and then compute what you feel like doing today. There you go, problem solved, hot and no brains but those you give her. Reality check lovebugs, you need to figure out what you want first then come at us and then find the right match.

Ladies, same thing. Either you want something or you don’t. If you can’t figure out what turns you on, (besides shopping and spending they guys money yadda yadda yadda – read some profiles sometime they are better then the sunday comics) they can’t give it to you. And please, please, please don’t be surprised when a boy calls you out if you are a bit on the silly side.

#8 The human factor!
If it becomes routine we are out of here. It takes both ends to work on a Relationship to make it sweet. Both ends…

#9 We only call them boys!
NO Tomato throwing please! Guess what, we only calls the gents on here, boys, bois, gurls etc. In reality I would hope that they are at least to a minimum adult men. With other words, stop treating them like they are your sons. Give a bit of credit to their intelligent, until of course they have proofen to you that they are retarded idiots who still need you to wipe their asses and tie their shoes. In that case you can have him. I raised my offspring, I am here to have a wonderful fun time with my subs. Personally I prefer a Warrior Sub to a little boy that thinks he can any day. Why? Because I know that he won’t fall apart the first time I tell him where he can shuff it. Please, the term boy is a turn on phrase. Remember the first powerful female influence in your life * your mother*…. You are not his Mother!

#10 Liar, Liar, Pants on fire!
Pay attention to shifts in conversations sometime. You see those that always agree, and can’t keep their own mind in one spot. There is a difference between seeing the reason behind something and agreeing that their is a valid point, and just saying oh yes… because so many others have. How is that being a Liar? Because you are lying to even yourself. Guess what, whatever you say you have to be able to stand behind. I have changed my opinions on a few things in the past as well, and have openly admitted to it, but then if you go back over my written records you can see where I personally want to just take a big fat stick and analize someone.
Lies, broken promises, wrongful presentation of facts, slander, annoying people just to get a reaction from them, being an idiot just to get attention all those are forms of lies and guess what need to be done as little as possible.

The way you present yourself to the world in the way you behave, the way you speak, they way you carry yourself, the way you respond gives off signals to the world about who you are, what you are about and if you are trustworthy or not.

Even on the internet, that is a fact. The internet is notorious for being a smoke screen behind which individuals hide. You can represent any type of fantasy to the world you want, but in the end when someone takes the time to get to know you, you will fail to keep the illusion up for long.

Showing a false front to the People around you is one of those useless attitudes. Not only are you wasting precious time (your own and those that are talking to you), but you are never really going to get what you are looking for. How can you, if you can not even be true to yourself.

Keeping it all in (Silence is golden) may seem like the more ladylike behavior and is named as the official high road, but in the end it is just another way of avoiding being labeled as anything other then “dominate” or “unattainable” or any other word that denotes that you are above reproach. In my opinion it however is not always the best road to take. Yes, there are times when silence is the better way to go, but if you never speak out your own mind, always just “control” your behavior, then in the end nothing ever changes.

Evolution and Social Advances where not made by people remaining silent. What would have happened if Martin Luther King would have been silent? It would have been the high road, but it would have been the wrong one to take. Speaking your mind, may not make you popular, but if you truly belief in what you say, then you should need to speak out.

Floating around a lifestyle that you have no real interest in, is another useless attitude! Why go to a financial domination website, if you find the idea of tributing repulsive. If you don’t get the fetish, if it isn’t for you, if you think it is just a get rich quick scheme or a get off quick scheme then you need to move along and leave it to someone that can truly appreciate it. Faking things to me is another useless attitude to adapt. I have a personal rule in my life. I don’t fake anything and that includes an orgasm. Why? Because it cheapens the real experience for me!

Pointing fingers at other people because they are different in their tastes, wasting energy on negative remarks, open flaming of others just to make yourself look better is another useless attitude to adapt. Just because something doesn’t work for you, doesn’t mean it is wrong. There are exceptions to every Rule of course, but 90% of the time this statement should stand.

Doing stupid things which will never benefit your development in spirit, training or financial success in any way is just another useless attitude to adept. In the end you can come off as a real jerk or bitch, and not in the right way either. There is a big difference in being annoying on purpose and just being naïve. When you think you need to be annoying to get attention, then all you are doing is getting yourself reduced to nothing. This means no time, no attention, no respect, and no regard. Do you really think that is a good idea?

Setting up a Profile that clearly identifies you as an individual of very shallow persuasion or behaving in a way that would do proud a street person is not only extremely foolish if you are trying to garner respect, but also a very useless attitude. If you have never even spoken to me, come on my profile and then suddenly decide I should be your friend just because you got lusty over my photos, you are on the fast track to a big fat no. Especially if it is not even accompanied by an introduction other then “You are hot, I want to serve you!” Please, don’t insult my intelligence here. You are not looking to serve me; you just want another Trophy for your Wall. No thank you, I am not interested. Likewise if your Domme profile is entirely made up of demands, no information and photos of you looking half drunk, high and flipping your finger then you are not really impressing the hell out of anyone for too long. This works for a short term, but not forever.

What is a useless attitude? A behavior, a way of being that does not advance you in any way. Does not do you any credit and worst yet, only makes you look bad. Be proud of who you really are and don’t try to be something you are not. It will always set you up for failure when you do.

Nobody likes Spam right? I am talking about the mass emailings to dozens or even hundreds of unsuspecting people. This is at best highly annoying when it is done for a vanilla oriented business, but when it is done by either Domina, Dom or submissive with an almost stock text at that, then it doesn’t become just annoying, but down right credibility damaging!

Yes, I know, here I go again with credibility. Don’t I have anything else on my mind? Well, when it comes to a new to you sub or Domina, that is pretty much all you have to go on to begin with.
How does she/he represent her/himself in public, in writing, in actions to promises made? Since you don’t know this person in real time yet, probably have just watched her from afar for a while, you only have her actions to go on. The same by the way goes for the submissive.

Now I know what you are thinking! How can I tell people otherwise that I am interested in finding either that “paypiggy” or the “Domina that makes me weak”? You have many ways for doing that, but spamming accounts is not the way to do it.

To me all that says is pathetic, desperate and not very imaginative to boot. Of course you can have emails with people, you are supposed to email with them, have little chats via your messenger or on the phone. You do need to get to know those who have gathered your interest, but that does not mean you need to follow the lines of the SexBlog ADS you get into your email constantly.

Personally for me that is a hit delete and block action. I hear about Domina’s in this specific category for some reason doing it a lot, but the funny thing is what doesn’t get spoken off as much are the submissives doing it as well.

I can guarantee you from first hand experience that this is so. With the exact same weasily, over the top text at that. Now, I can not speak for other ladies of course since I am purely myself, but I can tell you that this has not only raised my eyebrows but made me take potential boys I may have had some interest in go off my list.

You have just shown me that:

#1 I am not one bit important and you don’t find me as particularly special, but would rather serve any skirt that comes along. What is there in it for me? Nothing, because you will slut around as soon as you have any expectation brought towards you.

#2 You can not be trusted. You don’t even trust yourself enough to be noticed or to write a single Note to a special and worthy lady. Why would I want something that is so insignificant to begin with?

Now let us forward that to the Ladies for a second. If I, as the Domina, feel like that about the guys when they pull their mass emailings on me, what do you supposed it says about you as a Mistress?

#1 I am desperate and really dont’ care about you in particular. I just want to make some quick money and then you can get lost.

#2 I have nothing important to say. With other words, I am not only too stupid to write something of worth anywhere that would garner attention from someone, but I am also too lazy to put any real effort into this.

#3 I think that you are not smart enough to figure me out.

Ok, some guys love being persued and enjoy the Mistress taking the initiative. There is nothing at all wrong with that either, but to be honest you really have had something at one point that interested me besides your money that I send you a first email. In that case you better feel very honored.

To me however it is more about letting the guys come to me. I am still and will always be the Goddess. The Goddess doesn’t force herself on guys, that would make her nothing less then a little gutter slump. If you are wonderful, powerful and intelligent enough you won’t have to worry. It may take a while, before the submissive males will find you and approach you, but just like any other “religion”, when they do they will either get hooked on you in a hurry or be gone in a hurry.

What surprises me is that it is most of the time the Barbie Dolls who think they have to do the over saturation. Trust me sweey, with your looks, your big breasts they will find you. It may not be for submission at first, but if you have the power you claim you have in your mind and not in your left nipple, then they will learn their lesson quickly. You have nothing to worry about.

A word again to the submissive males and females. Take a look at the Domina’s first and then decide who you think might be worthy of your gift of submission. Remember that you will have to put in quiet a bit of service, time and yes tributes. We are talking about financial domination. Instead of sending out tons of meaningless emails to Mistresses you probably won’t even remember the name from select carefully. Then approach with respect instead of overly done flowerly words.

If you are not known for being a Spam Artist, I will already know that you are interested in serving me. That you have decided that I COULD be the ONE that you could be happy serving. Instead of asking me about what I can do for you (you are already out), give me some general background on yourself.
Who are you? How old are you? Where are you from? Are you single, married, divorced have 12 kids by 10 different women? Are you employed and if yes what is it you do? I don’t want figures, I just want to know that yes you are able to actually serve me in ALL ways I desire and not just with words.
What are your interests, both BDSM/ Fetish and Vanilla. We won’t always be talking about fetish to each other, is there something we have in common?
End your Note friendly and respectful, but not over the top. Now if you have impressed me as both intelligent and worthy of my time, I will respond back. If not, you will be either ignored completely (if you acted like a dumbass) or you will get a friendly, I am sorry but I dont’ think this would work for us with an explanation why.

Remember, that just because you are a Domina or a sub, means that the other end has to be impressed and overcome with honor at your contact.

Spam Artists get blocked, lose their credibility and in the end lose out on a lot of higher end quality people. It takes a bit of real effort in this lifestyle / fetish to make a good match.

Note: If you enjoyed this Article feel free to post it somewhere else. However, this is a copyright and belongs to my intellectual property. If you wish to repost, please be certain you give me the credit and the link to this post. Thank you for reading and following the simple Rules.

Money as the tie in, but not the major object!

There are very few submissive males that I find so interesting to converse with that the thought of tribute simply flies out of my mind, but when one of those rare treasures in the raw find me, it is as if I just opened the most exciting new journal and I am about to write a wonderful tale inside its blank pages.

As a writer, a poet and an artisan my thoughts are often very visual, very romantic and very fanciful in nature. I am an extreme personality with very little to hold my interest in between. In order for me to be enticed, I must be amused, interested, my curiosity sparked and my interest garnered. With other words those that are submissive must come at me with more then just the same old dry remarks.

Every Lady loves to be worshiped, needless to say we Mistresses are the biggest Diva’s there is. Hell give us a spotlight and we are more colorful then a male peacock, but for me the flattery will not get you everywhere. Matter of fact I have heard the same words so often that I often just roll my eyes.

I can just see you going, well that is not fair. How are we supposed to get your attention then? I didn’t say you couldn’t worship me, praise my power and beauty. As a submissive Goddess Worship should be one of the standards, but ironically I have heard better worship on a Niteflirt Call from a vanilla kinky caller with absolutely no BDSM background. His words were poetic, beautiful and the tone of voice struck a cord deep within my very core.

Most Mistresses have a wide range of personal interests. Now I don’t know about you, but if I was to try to find someone to serve, I would want to get to know that person first? Instead of going hot and heavy for the “stroke me kill”, why not ask her some questions about her own life.

The sweetest introduction I have ever had from a submissive mail online came in form of a Poem he wrote for me. There was no gimme in it, nothing at all but pure prayer coming from his lips to the paper. It was a prayer to be permitted to get to know me, the breath I inhale, the beauty I behold from my eyes.
It was not only touching, but it was different. He had my attention because he went out of his way to please me. Now how did he know I would not just brush him aside? Because he read, he read a lot about what I had to say.

Not only similarities attract, but often it is the opposites that keep me interested in you. For example I have a love for learning languages. Entice me, give me something new to learn, feed my intellect. What about finding out about my hobbies and lets just talk about them for a while? How many of you know for example what I paint? You know my erotica doubtlessly because so many of my places I hang out are purely Adult, but what else do I love to draw? What poetry do I write? Did you know I have been published for my Poetry and have gotten an award for it?

I have personal fetishes that turn me inside out and upside down, but do you really know what they are? Oh no my darlings, I do not have my private deep seated fetishes published because they are private to me. You have to ask me about them, work to get them out of me. I am handing you an in to give me pleasure, but you see once you know what brings me that pleasure, that sparkle in my eyes, I expect you to do something about it.

I prefer to have you give to me because you love me. Yes, my subs should worship me and love me, otherwise it is ridiculous. If I am to become your morning and your evening star, the moon and sun for which light you live, the air you breathe, then you need to get to know me first.

Likewise I need to know you. I invite all those that seek to tell me about themselves and I always get the same answers. Their name, their fetish, their age…it is always about their fetishes. Not once have I heard someone tell me, …I am the 3rd out of x amount of children. When I was ….I had a cat named….. I love to read and go for long walks..
You get what I am saying. I don’t want to have to drag everything out of you.

Entice me, intrigue me, enchant me and I will reward you richly. Remember that we are each out for something very special. We each have an agenda. The money, the gifts is a bonus, but that is it. If you can’t give me that which will get me interested in you however, then yes all I will want from you is money!

So give me something else to focus on and lets discover each other. That can be an exciting ride all in itself. But the moment you start with the strokes, I will take the cash!

Just as I encourage the ladies to take a good hard look at their own resolve, their own reasons for doing what they do, so should the submissive body of this two sides realm be honest with them-selves. No matter what gender you are, no matter what your orientation, you can only grow within your own right if you are 100% truthful with your-self.

I have put together a few Questions for you and just as with the Domme Self-Questionnaire I ask you to link to this Blog if you decide to republish it somewhere else. I do hold copyright to it, so please don’t disrespect that.

Go ahead, grab a piece of paper and a pen or fire up your trusty word program and copy and paste the questions below. Be honest, direct and bold in your responses. Keep them safe somewhere and after duration of about 6 months ask these same questions again. You may find that your answers will have slightly changed as you continue on your personal journey as a submissive.

Let us begin:

1. What do you consider yourself? A fetishist, a submissive, a slave or a player?
2. What has sparked your interest in BDSM?
3. What has sparked your interest in financial domination?
4. Are you in this fetish or alternative lifestyle mainly for your own satisfaction, or for the service to another you respect?
5. What are you fetishes? Make a list with 3 columns and put the following on the top. Very interested, Can take or leave, NO way! Now feel those columns out and watch them shift as you progress.
6. Have you had any real time experience?
7. If yes, what was it. I want you to recall everything without letting your memory embellish it. The good, the bad, the aftercare etc.
8. If no, what do you expect to happen in a real time session?
9. When confronted by a Mistress with a lot of experience, do you become over submissive, defensive, aggressive, insolent, pretentious?
10. Are you married, engaged or coupled to someone outside your field of interest?
11. If yes, is she / he your play partner?
12. If you are coupled, but he/she is not your Play Partner why do you not try to garner their interest?
13. No interest from their end, think you are perverted?
14. If you answered yes to this question, then have you known your desires before you got with this person?
15. If yes, why did you get with them anyways?
16. You are too afraid to bring it up?
17. Can you understand your desire and do you think you are going to have sexual involvement with your Mistress / Master?
18. How do you go about finding your perfect match?
19. How do you present yourself?
20. Are you willing to proof yourself worthy of her attention?
21. Do you have a problem having to show your attentiveness to the Mistress by filling Assignments, tributes etc.
22. Do you want to truly get to know her on a more personal level? Her hobbies, her favorite xyz?
23. Do you want to serve a real person or a fantasy?
24. How important are her looks to you?
25. What turns you on the most about a Mistress?
26. What turns you off the most about a Mistress?
27. If you could as your potential Mistress ONE QUESTION that is completely off base from the fetish, what would it be?

Enjoy the Quiz!

Looking for quick and easy money? Being a Pro-Domme / Financial Mistress is not the way to go.

I hear this so often and watch the indication that just because you are a Financial Mistress money is simply being handed to you. That all you have to do is sit on your ass and look powerful, quirk a smile and flip your finger and the bois just flock to your side. For some reason both bois and new to the fetish Girls seem to think that is the way it works and this is the way it goes.

I grant you that for a little while it might even work for you like that. I have seen plenty of 18 / 19 year old hard bodies capitalize on their looks and bratty behavior. Sure it isn’t hard to entice a cock into standing at attention when you are sitting there in Bra & Panties and your body has no signs of time on them yet. The guys’ stroke, you tease and show your-self, they get weak and tribute. A great solution? Only for a short time, because eventually that is not enough for those that are truly financial submissives, fetishists etc at heart.

Being a good Domme, either online or real time, takes a lot of dedication, a lot of hard work, a desire to really learn and grow constantly, a love for what you do and a certain flair that only comes not only with time, but with absolute enjoyment of what you do. In the long run you have to be able to cultivate relationships, that are often very difficult to maintain. You have to be able to constantly be creative, be able to put time aside for the training of your submissive male/female even when all you want to do is kick back and relax for a while.

What about the upkeep, the output, the considerable imagination you need to bring to the table? Just like with every other relationship, if you can’t keep it exciting and flowing, it will get old quickly. You need to be able to understand human psychology; you need to understand behaviors of the various males you deal with. You need to be able to entice, become the strong partner without ever losing your feminine behavior.

You need to be able and willing to learn, to except defeat from time to time, to admit when you are wrong and get over yourself as well. As much as you need to be able to make those bois understand that their first priority should be to you, to serving you, to adoring and worshiping you, you need to understand and handle the flip side of it as well.

Being just a spoiled little brat like a Daddies Girl has nothing to do with financial domination in the long run! In the long run you need to be able to give back. What happens when your looks fail? What happens when the bois need something to entice other then your body? What then? How do you keep the flow moving forward strongly?
What about when life throws you curve balls? What happens when your submissive suddenly has issues that are strongly concerning him? Can you turn from greedy bitch to wise counselor and still not lose your integrity?

Regardless if I am training a financial submissive online or in real time, it will take up a lot of my time. Will I drain him during that time spend? Yes, I will, to certain degrees, but I am still learning him with each session we talk.

Not only do I need to get into his mind, be solidly lodged deep within, but I also need to be able to understand how he ticks. You see some are never more then a quick fix, they don’t make good subs. They really are more of a cock driven crowd.
You learn that when you drain them and then make them wait on you, while you go and take a bath, fix a meal. You will see if they have the time and frame of mind, to sit and wait for your return. A loyal sub, will do so gladly. If he must leave, there will be a message explaining what happened.

You have those that have excuses constantly, why they can’t do something for you. Are the really worth the trouble? That is up to you. When you deal with those that are good and large gift givers when they feel like it, but at others times just waste your time and won’t do as told, do you retain them or cut them off?

With other words you will have to learn to decide what is acceptable for you. It is really difficult to send someone away that has in the past has send tributes to you well and often, but then has for one reason or the other gone bad. It is just as difficult to sit there and take hours of your time to plan a session for someone that does not appreciate the fine work you have put into him in the end.

Finding a good match is so important. But how do you find those matches? How do you know if you will in the end be good for each other? You learn by watching, listening and learning about each other.

For me it takes intelligent behavior and a willingness to learn from me, to even be considered raw material. I have two sets of rules for my subs and I treat them accordingly to which set I use.

I have those that I know will never last it out with me. They are just not that type of person. They amuse me with their cash value, but that is just about it. I would be a plan liar to say that I don’t enjoy using them for what they have to offer me, but past that they are no use to me. I can’t really have any good conversations with them, because we have nothing in common. They are just not on my level of wisdom and have no desire to ever get there. They don’t care about anything other then getting a quick fix and their rocks off. With other words, they are useless to me for anything other then the money and gifts I can get out of them. Since I refuse to lie, there is no harm done. You will know if I find you in that category, because if you are I won’t talk to you for longer then 2 minutes unless you tribute to me.

The other category are those that I consider raw potential for a long haul. I enjoy our every day conversations. We can talk about hobbies, spend time in each others company and I know much about them in a short time. They truly put my welfare, both physically and mentally first and are willing to do whatever it takes to make my life just a little easier. Those are the ones I adore and don’t mind spending time with from time to time, without any tribute at all. They usually have their set tributes once a week, once a month and I give them playtime when I desire to do so. Neither is ever requested. They do their part and I do mine. There is no force or push behind it, it happens naturally. Those are also the ones I set sessions up for on my own, look for them to check in with me sometimes daily. I hear about their day. For them it is truly a relationship that is being build up slowly and carefully.

You see that the word time and effort comes up a lot. I will make a statement that may not work for everyone, but if I would count the amount of time I put into my financial domination and the money and gift value I receive in return I can tell you that most months after dividing time and money I don’t even make minimum wage.
Does this sound like something that is easy money?

In essence, it is something that is not always exciting either. There are days when you almost have to force the issues with your piggies. It is as if you are dealing with a spoiled child that suddenly decided that you were being a bad mommy. Sounds a bit silly, but truly you need to understand that bois are very needy creatures.

So ladies if you think you will turn this into yet another get quick rich scheme keep thinking and looking. Bois if you think those initial $25 to $100 Tributes that so many of you bitch about is too much, then let me assure you that a Psychiatrist or Sex Therapist would charge you double the amount…and trust me I am much better.